First date jitters. We all get them regardless of how long we’ve been in the dating pool. Part of the excitement that comes along with the first date is learning to get to know the person sitting across from you. Sharing fun facts about one another’s interests shed light on personality and character. Every now and then in our dating adventures we run across that one person who unexpectedly shifts gears on the date. You’ve been there…please tell us you’ve been there. Ya know, you’re two drinks in, feeling relaxed and getting good vibes that the date is going well. As you’re sitting across from him exchanging your favorite scenes from Game of Thrones, is when he moves in a tad bit closer, grabs your inner thigh and whispers in your ear how he wants a voyeur in the bedroom to fulfill his sexual fantasy. You were expecting to exchange a first kiss, not get a sexual confession bomb.
If the topic of sex is discussed too soon, you run the risk of turning off the other party. Not to mention killing the intimacy and the budding romance. Although no need for unnecessary drama, if someone “goes there” we suggest changing the subject. Nothing like having a good segway in mind. This is the only time to when it is allowed to bring up the forbidden topics of religion or politics. If the conversation intensifies and his insistence is to know about you sexually, then you know that you are pretty much dealing with someone who is just looking for a hookup.
While sex is certainly an interesting topic of conversation, we feel it is much better to be explored after you know a little bit more about each other. It should be eased into. Curiosity is healthy, but those discussions are much more appropriate to be held when there is an established rapport built with each other. You should know his favorite comfort food before you learn his safe word. Once you have become familiar with one another then all bets are off; let your freak flags fly.
