How many of you are with us when we say that the dating playbook has changed significantly within the past 10 years? What was once taboo of meeting someone online is now the accepted social norm of meeting a potential love interest. Ten years ago, people put themselves online as a serious attempt in search for their mate; usually after exhausting many other efforts. Whereas nowadays, online profiles are like gym memberships; we all have one regardless of how active we are. It’s hard to define what goes on today as forming “relationships”. People just talk, perhaps catch some feelings, end up sleeping together and form “situation-ships”. We live in a world of immediate gratification and easy accessibility, whether it comes to selecting our shoes, our clothing and our men; all thanks to the Internet for help in facilitating this process. The virtual world has provided us with an unlimited amount of options. It has changed our dating universe from the people we once met through friends, family, school or work to people from all ends of the earth; all with the swipe of a finger. You meet people who show you a world outside of yours; they expose you to new concepts, hobbies, and experiences. Your horizons are broadened and you cross paths with some amazing people along the way where you otherwise would not have been privy to meet. You start painting a picture of how your life could pan out with all these different men you meet. “Can I churn butter?” “Can I herd cattle?” “Can I live a bi-coastal lifestyle?” “Can I be a Stepford Wife?” “If he is successful and has some type of tax shelter to cover his illegal business activities, is it that big a deal? Is it something I could look past?”
You started off simple, talking to a guy here and a guy there. Before you know it you find yourself copying and pasting the same text message to 15 different people, asking what they had for breakfast. Meanwhile, is it really necessary to know a soccer team amount of men’s breakfast order? How is that impacting your day? It’s not. You just lost sight of your original goal. You know; the one of meeting the right guy, settling down and starting a family? Well, that has been overtaken by non-committal playfulness. You temporarily chuck your good girl morals into an area of your brain called the Fuckit Bucket and play. No judgement here. It’s a riptide that anyone could get caught up in. And sometimes you have to go all in and let it ride not knowing how long the current will last and how far it will take you off shore. It’s like re-entering kindergarten, as adults, and playing in a social and collaborative dating environment. And there, our dear friends, is the start of The Kindergarten Effect (“TKE”).
